It’s November 10.  Tomorrow is the first anniversary of the worst day of my life – the day my water broke with Avery and Sophie.

November 11th – the day Canada Remembers.  For me, the day our happiness shattered.  My water broke and we heard the words, “It’s all over”.  Tomorrow will be a dark day for me.

November 12th – the day our girls came into the world.  Their birthday, even though they never took a breath.  The day we got to hold them in our arms, exclaim over their perfect fingers and toes, and kiss their foreheads for the first and last time.

On Wednesday I want to celebrate the life of our girls, however short.  Although here for only 20 weeks, they brought unparalleled joy and excitement to our world.  I have thought and thought about how to do this, but haven’t come up with anything that resonated with both DH and myself.

And so, I come to you, my online friends – do you have any ideas for celebrating the lives of little ones no longer with us?



  1. Nicole said

    We sent Isabella some ballons in heaven(and wrote messages to her)… But i’ve also heard of planting a tree or some sort of flower/plant..

    I will be thinking of you on Wednesday!



  2. Amanda said

    My husband and I sponsored a program at our local public library for preschoolers. We knew we’d never be able to raise big bucks, but this was within our means. It didn’t end up costing that much and it was wonderful to see the kids who would have been about the same age as our boys party and play. The posters advertised that the program was in the boys’ memory, so it was nice to have them acknowledged publically.

    Anyway, tomorrow will be a hard day. I know because my angelversary was just over a month ago. But I wish you the best and hope you come through it.

  3. Carly said

    Dear Heather,

    I need to have a hard think for you about this one.

    I will be back later with some hopefully nice ideas 🙂

    Love Carly x

  4. Carly said

    I have had a few thoughts.

    For Christian’s first birthday we had a special gathering at our home. Just the family. Christian was born on Australia day so everyone was graced with a day off work. We had everyone over in the morning and then they went home. We did not plan anything else. To be honest I wish I had of planned so much more.

    My husband laid on the couch with Scarlett and watched T.V and I sat in the other room with River (in my womb) and just bawled my eyes out while I watched his candle burn. Next Year in January I will be buying some warm baby blankets and I am going to get my Mum to sew messages of “Too perfect for this Earth” on them I will take them into the hospital where I left him. Something I think will be hard but I think I need to do it. I want to try and help to comfort other families who are about to start their grief journey. We will also attach a message on a balloon to Christian and release it at the beach.

    If I can suggest anything it would be make sure you have your night planned. Whether you just listen to beautiful music and have a nice dinner together. You could take a walk at sunset if it is not too cold.

    I think that you will find the perfect idea whether it comes from a suggestion or your own heart. I will be doing something for your sweet hearts too 🙂

    Thinking of you in your hardest two days. Heather you will get through this.

    Much Love and Hope

    Carly x

  5. Laurie Lloyd said


    I agree with all of the comments above and planting something in their memory is also a beautiful way to remember and nurture. Most of all, when your heart is able to agree on something, it will be right for you. Trust your heart and I am praying for the day to be gentle for you. My heart hurts for you.

    Laurie in Ca.

  6. This must be a hard time for you.

    Perhaps you could plant trees, or another living reminder for your girls? Something tangable that you can touch and watch grow? Unless that would be too difficult.

    You could check w/your local zoo, planitarium, conservancy (or the like) and see if they are building a walk way–around here they sell rememberance bricks-you could add the girls names birth date to them.

    I wish you much peace on an otherwise hard day.

  7. Rebekah said

    I’ll be thinking of you… we haven’t come up to one year yet so I don’t know whether I’ll want to be around people or not that day. We’re currently raising money for a project with our local hospital to be donated on the one year mark. Let me know what you ended up doing and how you’re feeling. I like the idea of planting something that you can watch grow as the years go by.

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