“If Only” Dates

One year ago today, we shared the news of our pregnancy with my family.  They were ecstatic for us … although we rarely talked about it, they knew we had wanted children for awhile.  It was my nephew’s birthday and we were all so excited to think about the next party we would have for him.

Today the table felt empty.  I hosted the party and couldn’t help the “if onlys” from streaming in.  If only there were two more at the table, if only I was too tired out to coordinate napkins, balloons, and plates, if only I was holding my own and not my newest nephew.

And yet, as they left I help my hand to my stomach and felt the first glimmer of hope.  Just maybe next year will be different.

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1 Comment »

  1. Carly said

    I am so happy that you felt that glimmer of hope. I pray that next year is different for you 🙂 I hope you are feeling well and strong. Take care and be kind to yourself

    Love Carly x

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